How To Get A Handle On Your Little One39s Defiant Behavior

Newborn Tips#1: Don't Hush-A-Bye-Baby
You don't have to be quiet while the baby is sleeping. The womb is loud, and newborns are used to the noise. When ours first came home, we watched television and I would vacuum, wash dishes and talk on the phone around her while she slept. She got used to sleeping with noise, and I could get stuff done. I am still able to vacuum in her room while she sleeps (she is 14 months), and she is peaceful and well rested when she wakes up.
Newborn Tips#2: Soothe Your Wailing Newborn
When my baby cries, I comfort her by patting her back in a heartbeat-like rhythm. That helps her burp more quickly, and it also helps her relax if she's crying from insecurity. If this doesn’t work, I also try one or all of Dr. Harvey Karp's five calming moves: swaddling, shushing, holding her on her side, swinging her or letting her suck. Sometimes it takes all six!

Additional Information:

Toddlers are naturally very self centred. They have not acquired the sense of self awareness that the majority of adults naturally possess and this can end up manifesting itself in tantrums, selfish behavior and bossiness.

It is not unusual for even the most well behaved 3 year old to exhibit bossy tendenciesand this can leave a number of parents perplexed and frustrated.

Bossiness in a small child can also be explained by the feeling of domination that it can give them in a world in which grownups have all the control. They will not be doing this consciously, but it is an impulse that they followand which ultimately makes, making them feel as if they are reclaiming some of that power. The good news is that there are some things that you can do that might help in reigning your childs bossiness in a bit.

Tips For Bringing Your Childs Bossiness Under Control

Copy-catting

As a general rule, children learn by imitation. If they observe you, or any other grownups that they spend a lot of time with, exhibiting an overpowering tendencies then they may try to emulate it. So if you are always screaming at your children to get them to do something, or if are constantly bossing other people around instead of asking people to do things in a nicer and diplomatic manner then they will identify this and copy it.

Whether you are aware of your own bossiness or not, you need to approach the way you act objectively when around your children and don't take it personally if you notice something you don't like about yourself.

Newborn Tips#3: Help Get Your Baby to Latch
If you are having latch-on issues while breastfeeding your baby, you can use breast shields to help the process. This was a wonderful tip that I learned from my lactation consultant. I had to use the shields for an entire month before my baby would latch onto my own nipple without them. Had it not been for the breast shields, I would not have been able to continue nursing my baby.
Newborn Tips#4: Get Prepped
At 3 weeks, babies’ days and nights become more predictable, and you can focus on yourself in addition to your newborn. One way to do that is by reducing your stress level - and having everything ready for your hungry baby and yourself is one way to do that. Start by prepping for the next feeding as soon as the previous one is over. For example, after an 11 p.m. feeding, get ready for the 2 a.m. one by prepping whatever you need for feeding and putting out fresh drinking water for yourself so you don’t have anything to think about in the middle of the night. During the day, take advantage of the baby’s naps to work out, shower or catch up on e-mail, or take a nap too.

Social Skills

Another straightforward idea, but something that is often difficult to carry out is to teach them good social abilities. Teach them to share from a young age. If they start being selfish, or bossy towards someone ask them if they would like it if someone behaved that way towards them. Having them take into account how their conduct affects others can be a key turning point in their growth.

Give Control

Bossiness is a type of control, so if you child perceives that they don't have it, they will attempt and take it. But suppose you GAVE them some control? When you ask your child if they would like potatoes or carrots with their fish cakes, or if they want to watch some cartoons or play with their barbie dolls for some time you are putting some control back in their hands.

Make certain you don't leave the questions open ended though. Make sure you restrict the conceivable outcomes to just two. This or that.. This provides them with a feeling of control and they will feel like they have had a say in the outcome of their day thus resulting in not so much of of a need to take control from other people in the form of bossy behavior later on.

Attention

Quite often, a child's bossy or disagreeable behavior is simply a plea for attention, so take a genuine look at how much time you spend with them every day. Take a hard honest look at whether or not you are enjoying enough time playing and talking with them before you berate them for yanking at your sleeve to go play in the backyard when all you choose to do is stand sipping beer with your friends.

Newborn Tips#5: Keeping Your Baby Awake During Feedings
When our baby was eating slowly and sleepily, my husband and I would massage her cheek to stimulate her to eat faster. A gentle stroke with a fingertip on her cheek was all it took, and on those long sleepless nights, this simple trick was a godsend! Our friends have found it works great with their infants too. When babies eat efficiently until they're full before going to sleep, they sleep for longer between feedings. And that means you’re both likely to be calmer!
Newborn Tips#6: Help Your Baby Bond with Dad
Make sure your baby has ample time alone with Daddy. His touch and voice are different than yours, and this will begin a bonding process and give you a break. Plus, it gets the baby used to being with someone other than you. The first few times can be hard. Make sure your baby is fed and well rested, as this will give you at least one or two hours before you're needed again. Then leave Dad and the baby alone. If you stay nearby, make sure the baby can’t see or hear you, and resist the urge to go into the room and "fix" things if she starts crying. Your baby cries with you and you experiment to find out what's wrong. Dads need time to do this too - in their own way. By allowing this time, your child will learn there is more than one way to receive comfort, which will help immensely when you leave your baby with a sitter or another family member for the first time. You could have your partner bathe her, put her to bed or just read or talk to her.
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